Femininity Guide for Transgender Women

transgender women

Transsexuals have a yearning to live life to the fullest. This is the reason they are “reborn” when they get sex reassignment surgery. However, when they get a new lease on life thanks to the transsexual surgery, many transgender women are faced with the challenge of how to be a feminine. Women have a deeply ingrained need to look elegant and fashionable. There is a lot that goes into making a woman look stylish. For example, men often find a woman’s handbag to be a puzzling conundrum due to the variety of items that are found inside. Though clothes, accessories, and cosmetics cannot be ruled out as contributing to femininity, the following three points play a pivotal role in a woman’s life.

Understanding femininity

transgender women

As mentioned above, femininity is more than what one wears or puts on their face. Femininity stems from how one carries their body. Words that aptly and precisely capture femininity would be, “your body makes you feel sexy, your face makes you pretty, your smile makes you gorgeous, but it’s your mind that ices the cake by making you beautiful!” Therefore, it would suffice to say that no amount of money in this world could buy femininity because it is largely a disposition.

Some trans women are at times reduced to employing “femininity coaches” so as to improve their femininity. However, while the hardest task of being a female is this aspect of understanding femininity, it must be shouldered by the transgender woman, regardless of the cost of hiring a coach.

Your movement and voice


Women do not walk or move slovenly; there is grace in their movements. Transgender women have to abide by such decorous body movement so as to stay in touch with their feminine side. As a transgender woman, if you do not want people to stare at you every time you saunter into a room, then you have to buckle down and train your body movements to mirror those of a female. At times, women don’t walk; they gracefully slide. Women don’t take a seat by dropping into a chair; they gently sit down. Women don’t sit down with their legs apart; the legs have to be neatly closed together.

When it comes to the voice, it has to be gentle like a falling feather. You can read magazines and watch videos like ‘Develop a Female Voice’ by Melanie Ann Phillips. You can also practice how to speak like a woman with a friend who is honest and unbiased. Whilst training how to speak and move like a woman, learn to constantly smile because it brings out your feminine side.

What you carry in a handbag

Transgender women find themselves carrying handbags, something that was probably foreign to them initially. Some examples of things that are a “must” in a woman’s handbag include the following: hand sanitizer, feminine hygiene products (tampons), deodorant, a compact mirror, lip products, cash, safety pins, a notebook and a pen.

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22 thoughts on “Femininity Guide for Transgender Women”

    1. No, I can’t tell you you aren’t a woman.

      I can tell you that your grammar, and poor choice of internet idioms and acronyms detract from your message….perhaps the same way your sloveny movements detract from your feminine persona!


  1. I like it! I am often criticised by the cis females of my family as in the opinion of many, I go ‘*over the top*’! I am über-femme in my presentation. While this is, to some extent, owing to my never having been a 13yr old girl, it is part of the ‘*glamour*’ I cast over myself to ‘*pass*’. I watch ballet (and when I have the go ahead for post op exercise I am taking adult beginners classes), and I avidly attempt to absorb the grace of movement like a sponge! It is correct to point out that this is by no means essential to femininity, but it is essential to me! I love it when I hear compliments to, “her (my) feminine grace” every bit as much as I hate being misgendered, “sir” or “he”.
    In many respects, I am a “vintage doll”, a painted relic of a byegone era. I am every bit as OK with that as I am with the girls who shave her heads and swagger with the greasemonkeys. For my own taste when I check out a potential playmate, I am attracted to the girl with the lipstick and heels! I am shameless about this.
    And yess!! I do have all those things in my handbag. My concession to genderless survivalism is also usually a multitool, a maglight (and every girls gotta carry a pair of handcuffs!! Right, Lol)


  2. I think you are muddling up women and how a lady is meant to act. This description doesn’t apply to most women, but it does apply to those trying to be ladylike

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I knew when I shared this on my facebook page that it might well stir up a hornets nest!

    I think there is no confusion in recognition of what is *actually* feminine and what is a mere glamorous fripary, to *present* feminine. If I have correctly interpreted this article, it actually, very astutely highlights what I *have to do* to be treated with some dignity and respect in comparison to what a cis gender woman will have to do in order to gain the same respect.
    I am not *gender neutral*, *non binary*, *genderqueer* etc. I identify clearly close to an extreme of the gender spectrum. I am not going to apologise for this I am happy to identify as a woman! Unfortunately, owing to the fact I was born in a male body, it has taken years of hormones, highly intrusive surgery and much practice to make this transformation work for me!
    There are still many aspects of day to day living, which cause me trouble:-

    1) There is a clear and present danger to be reckoned with just navigating on foot in certain areas! To *pass* as *feminine* is a distinct advantage!

    2) I am having one hell of a struggle finding employment having been made redundant during my transition. Again, passing as cis is an advantage, right or wrong!

    3) I am extremely lonely, my marriage having disintegrated early on, during my transition. I find myself seemingly more attractive to all genders if I pass as cis!

    4) I have very low self esteem, on account of the trails and tribulations of my transition. My makeup and deportment, allow me to *adopt a role*. Quite simply, this makes me feel better! I am going to make no apology for this! I will choose lipstick over prozac any day and the world can just go jump if they don’t like it! Lol!!

    Long story short… It is a highly judgemental world. For all you judgemental types out there, who would demonise this article and it’s authoress. Or demonise me for complying with gender expectation… Perhaps you are lucky enough to just *fit in* anyway,or have been lucky enough not to have to *present to the board* or are lucky enough to have attracted your soulmate; perhaps you are lucky enough to live in an area where you are not especially in danger of attack!?
    I am not going to slap you on the back and say “well done”, because you happen to be *luckier* than me! I am lacking in many of these simple securities. I make no apology for using *wiles* to even the balance. I wear a *ladies* watch as it is a clear signifier, for example! It helps me get through my life. I have similarly had to examine all the *tells* and giveaways that reduce me, in the eyes of a harshly critical society, to the status of a free cabaret act, or freakshow!
    Perhaps the fault still lies within society, in the prejudice against minorities and the human need to pick on the *different*. Perhaps women are not actually as emancipated as we would like to believe.
    Perhaps I am just happy with my lipstick, my heels and my balletic mannerisms and the world could just get off my case about it as there are many more willing to criticise if I dont *pass*.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Keep on doing what you believe is good for you, no matter what the society or others think about. No one is responsible for your happiness, but you.


  4. What a complete load of rubbish. I appear to have got the contents of my hand bag all wrong. I guess I’d better get my passport changed back to “M” then.
    If you need advice how to be a woman you shouldn’t be transitioning in the first place!


    1. I politely disagree. Some of us are blessed with thin figures, a caring female family member, a feminine shape and a voice that doesn’t sound like a lumberjack. These individuals need all the advice they can get and yes, I’m one of them. What doesn’t fit for you may work for someone else and make their transition easier or at least give them a path to follow.


  5. Hi.
    Different for every one and that includes those of us who are female some of us are born different and with in a few communitys we are rejected ,
    I’m from New Zealand and don’t have issues like some who wont to be like or women or belive they are born in the wrong body.

    I’m an intersexed female and very well accepted for who I am I’m very feminine in my own right though my facial features are quite masculine depending on how you wont to see me as a person or you perceive me,

    so some people may think I’m a male who like to dress as normal women do… oh well… never mind matters not.
    My many friends think different and just accept who I am and the way I am so no issues and with in our membership of well over 2000 people plus others around myself,

    Did I try to be feminine no just a normal part of my makeup, how I dress, in many different styles and of years ago 1400 to 1700 Renaissance German and 1900 to 1914 Edwardian. plus I make and style my own clothes so I don’t conform to todays look or follow fashion yet for all that I’m well accepted,



  6. Hi,
    To be a woman , in my case was quite easy as I have grown into being one I did / do have an advantage that some people don’t like , = any way. being born different does bring with it some issues that can help greatly yet there are quite a few that are disadvantages , how one use,s them is going to not help in some aspects and in others will help.

    Am I feminine yes , just not in my facial features am I a female yes with out her womb.
    am I a woman yes because I was able to grow as one, am I accepted… YES…by both men and women and because I have a high rank in my work detail I have and am given a lot of respect and I have earned that , so I’m not a kid with out experance,

    as to how I look depends on who see,s or meets me and most people soon see I’m a pretty normal woman though not pretty or beautifull as a male would like to see women in the context of being sexy and for many would like more between the sheets.

    because I was born different and many people have no idear of our difference it can bring a ? as to are we male or female or for those who know we …ARE… both male and female that includes our own hormones as well , okay I’m an intersexed female and because of that in my case is why some wont understand why facial wise my features are quite male.ish so then people who don’t know then begin to ??? are we for real.

    yet most soon over come that and just talk with myself as a normal female of cause there are many women like myself who have very striking features and quite male in looks ,

    My body shape and size is quite feminine and like some I know we checked our selfs against each other , my added feature is I’m very strong because of training and my work over the last 50 years , no muscle mass as some men .

    Some here and other fourms talk about trying to be like women in look walk and other aspects, the best way to sum up is I’m my own person and I have my own gait and movements much the same as many women and it,s about being who I am as a person first then being a normal woman in my overall detail of life and being who I am.



  7. The stereotypes that kill real women. The stereotypes that real feminists have been fighting forever. This article outlines precisely what trans ideology has in common with MRA. And what are you going to use those tampons for, pray tell?


    1. *magnetic resonance angiogram??*
      To be fair, I did wonder about the tampons though! Lol! Here is the way I see it. Trans women get treated better if they pass. The reason for this is not any fault of these women. I can understand a modicum of snark about the *instructive* style of the article. I can understand that some might feel patronised, others misrepresented. I believe the authoress has merely given a little lifehack for anyone whom it may help. I get what is being said and it’s a useful tool in the armoury of trans coping-strategies! I feel that anyone who disagrees might just in fact look away cause I guarantee that this will help some struggling trans woman or tgirl. (Perhaps more aimed at the tgirls??)
      This said, my handbag actually contains a singularity which pulls all things in eventually! Spanners on occasion, a crystal, (which may or may not have esoteric power), my eldest son’s epipen, valium, an umbrella, a tac-ops style flashlight and a useful penknife/multitool. Also the usual hairbrush, spare tights, makeup, a sharpie marker and a spare top in case I want to rock up anywhere after work without my crap uniform polo shirt! (Yes all this fits in my handbag!!! *singularity*)


  8. What load of prescriptive tosh A woman can walk and talk and sit any way she wants. And my rucksack has none of those items. This reinforces binary thinking


  9. This is so offensive to women! This article has reduced us to image conscious, delicate ‘flowers’, exactly the pre conceived garbage that women have been fighting against for generations! I don’t drift like a bloody feather, I walk like a normal human being. The essence of being a woman is not what you carry in your handbag, it is an intrinsic knowledge of womanhood that comes from experiencing what being a woman entails. Girlhood and female adolescence, periods, childbirth and menopause. It is a tangible sense of self coming from generations of women that have fought to be seen as equal. If you are a trans woman, you are a trans woman. There is no shame in that, but it is not the same as being female by birth.


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