How to Embrace Your Femininity without Comparing Yourself to Other Ciswomen

MTF Trans Woman

There is no cookie cutter path to become a confident MTF Trans Woman. You will at times find yourself stumbling in your quest to embrace your femininity. When you stumble, find yourself envious, or compare yourself to other cis-woman, know that you are not alone. Many MTF Trans Women fall into the pit of comparing themselves with cis-women.
It is often said that comparison is the death of joy. In fact, it is one of the surest ways to lower your self-esteem. But how do you stop comparing yourself to others? Below are some valuable tips that will offer you an answer.

Realize that Comparing Yourself is Destructive

MTF Trans Woman

While comparing yourself to others is a fairly normal behavior, it can be self-destructive in many situations. This is because each person is their own worst critic, meaning when we compare ourselves to others, we tend to judge ourselves more harshly. The first step to stopping this behavior is by consciously realizing that it is destructive. You may always find cis-women to be pretty, but their beauty has nothing to do with yours. You are beautiful in your own way separate from them.

Focus on Yourself

For you to make positive strides on your journey to embrace your femininity, you should compare yourself only to yourself. When you look at yourself in the mirror, smile more vibrantly than you did yesterday. Think about what you have achieved and all your potential for the future. When you compare yourself to yourself instead of other cis-women, you will be more appreciative of your uniqueness. Additionally, this process helps you feel good about yourself without necessarily having to think less of others.

Be Kind and Polite

The way you treat others often reflects the way you feel about yourself. As a result, showing compassion for yourself allows you to be more compassionate towards others and vice versa. If you tend to criticize other people, you will likely be more critical of yourself. However, if you are kind to others, you will almost certainly be kind to yourself.

Focus on the Positives

MTF Trans Woman

Every person has flaws. A guaranteed way to magnify your flaws out of proportion is by comparing yourself with other people. People tend to present the best of themselves to the outside world both in person and on social media. You are likely comparing your flaws with the best the other person has to offer; it is not a fair comparison. Instead of comparing yourself with other people, try to focus on the positive aspects of yourself and your life. Make it a habit to think positively about yourself and others.

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Embracing the Journey from Female to Male

Female to Male

In this world, there are people who are born female but identify as male. Such people yearn to transition to the gender they have always identified with. If you are a female who identifies with the male gender, understand that you are not alone. Thanks to the advancement of technology, you can physically transition to the male you have always been.

Female to MaleThe surgery that will enable you to transform from female to male is known as Sex Reassignment Surgery. This surgery alters your physical features to match those of the male gender. It involves two stages: the upper surgery and the bottom surgery. The upper surgery includes a double mastectomy and the reconstruction of the chest. This will get rid of your bust and give you a flat, manly chest. The bottom surgery involves a surgery known as RFF Phalloplasty. This procedure involves the use of skin and veins from the forearm to construct a male phallus. Apart from RFF Phalloplasty, there is another similar procedure called ALT Phalloplasty that uses skin and veins from the thighs to make a male phallus instead.

Transitioning from female to male is a unique journey for each person who chooses to undertake it. You not only have to transition physically but socially as well. Below are some insightful tips that will help you learn how to embrace your journey from female to male.

Accept Yourself

Just because you do not identify with the gender you received at birth does not make you a basket case. It is perfectly normal not to identify with the gender assigned at birth. Many people, unfortunately, are faced with gender dysphoria due to this situation. Therefore, it is essential to accept who you are. In fact, accepting yourself is a vital step in your transitioning process.

Start by Coming Out

The best starting point for your transition is to come out. While this step may be uncomfortable, you need to take it nonetheless. Your family, friends, and loved ones need time to adjust to the news. Even after your physical transformation it might take time because people were used to the female you. During this step, you will need a strong support system, so finding friends and family members who are accepting of your change should be a priority.

Start Acting/Dressing like a Guy

Female to Male

Social transformation is an important step on your journey to embracing your masculinity. You can start your social transformation simply by acting and dressing like a guy. You cannot expect people to address you as a “he” when you are dressed in clearly feminine clothes. Remember: the acting will eventually have to stop for you to become the real you, meaning it will eventually become your reality and not an act. There are various websites online where you can read about how to project a manly image.

Seek Professional Help

For your physical transformation, you will need professional help. You should begin by talking to a therapist, who can help you with the emotional problems you may be going through. Next, you should look for a professional doctor who can advise you on the best route to follow for your physical transformation.

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Effective Tips for Feminizing Your Body Movements

MTF Trans Woman

If you are an MTF trans woman, then you understand that your body movements can make or break your feminine image. This is because the way you move plays a huge role in your overall look. Luckily, there are several simple techniques that a transgender woman can use to help feminize her body movements and project a feminine image.

Dress Suitably

MTF Trans WomenAs an MTF trans woman, how you dress matters. Not only does it reflect your sense of style but also how your body moves. Wearing clothes that fit your body well helps you move in a more feminine way. When practicing different body movements, you should avoid baggy clothes. If you are used to pants or jeans, change to skirts and dresses. The way you walk and sit are very different if you are wearing a skirt. Also, skirts help your body movement appear more profound. However, short skirts should be avoided.

Be Moderate

Many transgender women make the mistake of over-exaggerating their body movements. They think they will appear to be more feminine if they display such traits even more prominently than cis women. One of the most common areas that transgender women exaggerate are their hips. Swinging your hips too much looks more awkward than sexy. To master this art without overdoing it, simply put on heels and walk normally. Walking this way will make your hips sway naturally.

Avoid Poor Body Posture

Your body posture is the foundation of all your movements. If you want to feminize your body movements, start by mimicking feminine posture. An example of poor body posture you should avoid is slouching. Many tall MTF women make the mistake of slouching to minimize their height. Also, don’t arch your back to make your butt stick out more, as you are more likely to look silly than sexy.

Mind How You Sit and Walk

MTF Trans WomenIf you have lived all your life in “male mode,” adjusting how you sit and walk can be challenging. However, that does not mean it’s impossible. As a rule of thumb, always make sure that your knees are together when seated; there is nothing that can kill your feminine posture more than sitting down with your legs apart. Also, it is important to keep your head up and your elbows in when walking. Tucking your elbows in makes your feminine movements more profound.

Stretch Out Regularly

To feminize your body movements, you must have a body that is neither tense nor tight. Improving your flexibility can be achieved by stretching regularly. Stretching out will not only improve your body movements but also help you to have a fit and healthy body.

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Tips For Making A Long-Distance Transsexual Relationship Work

A Long-Distance Transsexual Relationship

Long-distance relationships are not for the faint of heart. Being a transsexual or endeavoring to date a transsexual is not for the faint-hearted either. Due to the bravery and dedication these people bring to the table, it should be clear that long-distance transsexual relationships can work in real life. However, this does not mean there won’t be any challenges. To make a long-distance transsexual relationships work, you must be willing to invest your time and commitment, as well as use some creativity. If you have found a match on a transgender dating site, but the only thing between the two of you is distance, do not fret.

There are ways to help you keep your long-distance transsexual relationship healthy, functional, and sexual. These tips include:

Keeping Your Word

Trust is a key ingredient in long-distance transsexual relationships. In order to keep you happy as a couple, it is important that both of you trust each other. If you have a plan to communicate on a daily or weekly basis, it is important that both of you honor that arrangement. You and your partner will only achieve stability if you create concrete plans. Concrete plans do not necessarily mean meeting physically; conversations and dates can be done virtually. For there to be unwavering trust, the two of you need to be confident that you can rely on each other.

Setting Aside Time for Each Other

Despite the distance, it is important that the two of you set aside time for each other regularly. All relationships require time and energy spent on communication. By dedicating time to each other and communicating often, both of you will be building a firm foundation for your love to stand on. Setting aside time for each other could be something as simple as a call after work every day or a simple “I love you” text before bed.

Keeping the Love Alive

Long-Distance Transsexual Relationship

To avoid either partner being sexually frustrated, it is important that both of you keep the love alive in a physical sense as well as an emotional sense. It is perfectly fine and natural to tease each other with dirty photos and sexy messages. Keeping your sex lives active and healthy in a long-distance transsexual relationship requires a bit is creativity. One example is phone sex, though technology provides for a variety of other options. Hearing your partner moan and breath sexily while the two of you pleasure yourselves can make it seem real. And when you are reunited, make sure to spend time together intimately.

Keeping on Keeping On

In every relationship, whether local or long-distance, it is highly recommended that you use your best judgment with what feels right for you and your partner. Despite the difficulties and frustration that distance causes, you can grow as a person and as a couple with a bit of commitment, communication, and creativity.

As a final note, it is important to discuss with your partner when the distance will end. Knowing that there is a concrete conclusion to the separation is very important in a long-distance transsexual relationship because it erases doubts and creates hope for both of you.

Laverne Cox: Bright Star and Transgender Activist

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