How to Embrace Your Femininity without Comparing Yourself to Other Ciswomen

MTF Trans Woman

There is no cookie cutter path to become a confident MTF Trans Woman. You will at times find yourself stumbling in your quest to embrace your femininity. When you stumble, find yourself envious, or compare yourself to other cis-woman, know that you are not alone. Many MTF Trans Women fall into the pit of comparing themselves with cis-women.
It is often said that comparison is the death of joy. In fact, it is one of the surest ways to lower your self-esteem. But how do you stop comparing yourself to others? Below are some valuable tips that will offer you an answer.

Realize that Comparing Yourself is Destructive

MTF Trans Woman

While comparing yourself to others is a fairly normal behavior, it can be self-destructive in many situations. This is because each person is their own worst critic, meaning when we compare ourselves to others, we tend to judge ourselves more harshly. The first step to stopping this behavior is by consciously realizing that it is destructive. You may always find cis-women to be pretty, but their beauty has nothing to do with yours. You are beautiful in your own way separate from them.

Focus on Yourself

For you to make positive strides on your journey to embrace your femininity, you should compare yourself only to yourself. When you look at yourself in the mirror, smile more vibrantly than you did yesterday. Think about what you have achieved and all your potential for the future. When you compare yourself to yourself instead of other cis-women, you will be more appreciative of your uniqueness. Additionally, this process helps you feel good about yourself without necessarily having to think less of others.

Be Kind and Polite

The way you treat others often reflects the way you feel about yourself. As a result, showing compassion for yourself allows you to be more compassionate towards others and vice versa. If you tend to criticize other people, you will likely be more critical of yourself. However, if you are kind to others, you will almost certainly be kind to yourself.

Focus on the Positives

MTF Trans Woman

Every person has flaws. A guaranteed way to magnify your flaws out of proportion is by comparing yourself with other people. People tend to present the best of themselves to the outside world both in person and on social media. You are likely comparing your flaws with the best the other person has to offer; it is not a fair comparison. Instead of comparing yourself with other people, try to focus on the positive aspects of yourself and your life. Make it a habit to think positively about yourself and others.

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Embracing the Journey from Female to Male

Female to Male

In this world, there are people who are born female but identify as male. Such people yearn to transition to the gender they have always identified with. If you are a female who identifies with the male gender, understand that you are not alone. Thanks to the advancement of technology, you can physically transition to the male you have always been.

Female to MaleThe surgery that will enable you to transform from female to male is known as Sex Reassignment Surgery. This surgery alters your physical features to match those of the male gender. It involves two stages: the upper surgery and the bottom surgery. The upper surgery includes a double mastectomy and the reconstruction of the chest. This will get rid of your bust and give you a flat, manly chest. The bottom surgery involves a surgery known as RFF Phalloplasty. This procedure involves the use of skin and veins from the forearm to construct a male phallus. Apart from RFF Phalloplasty, there is another similar procedure called ALT Phalloplasty that uses skin and veins from the thighs to make a male phallus instead.

Transitioning from female to male is a unique journey for each person who chooses to undertake it. You not only have to transition physically but socially as well. Below are some insightful tips that will help you learn how to embrace your journey from female to male.

Accept Yourself

Just because you do not identify with the gender you received at birth does not make you a basket case. It is perfectly normal not to identify with the gender assigned at birth. Many people, unfortunately, are faced with gender dysphoria due to this situation. Therefore, it is essential to accept who you are. In fact, accepting yourself is a vital step in your transitioning process.

Start by Coming Out

The best starting point for your transition is to come out. While this step may be uncomfortable, you need to take it nonetheless. Your family, friends, and loved ones need time to adjust to the news. Even after your physical transformation it might take time because people were used to the female you. During this step, you will need a strong support system, so finding friends and family members who are accepting of your change should be a priority.

Start Acting/Dressing like a Guy

Female to Male

Social transformation is an important step on your journey to embracing your masculinity. You can start your social transformation simply by acting and dressing like a guy. You cannot expect people to address you as a “he” when you are dressed in clearly feminine clothes. Remember: the acting will eventually have to stop for you to become the real you, meaning it will eventually become your reality and not an act. There are various websites online where you can read about how to project a manly image.

Seek Professional Help

For your physical transformation, you will need professional help. You should begin by talking to a therapist, who can help you with the emotional problems you may be going through. Next, you should look for a professional doctor who can advise you on the best route to follow for your physical transformation.

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Etiquette Tips for MTF Transgender Women

MTF Women

One of the biggest challenges MTF women face is how to behave femininely. This is usually because they were brought up as males. Nevertheless, in order to transition to the woman you always were, you need to learn womanly etiquette. As an MTF trans woman, you need to realize that the way you behave is just as important as your appearance. Dressing stylishly and then acting badly will not project a feminine image.

To learn womanly etiquette, you must first know what etiquette is. Etiquette can be defined as doing and saying things appropriately in each situation. Here are a few points that will help you learn and practice womanly etiquette.

Greeting

Your greeting is the first interaction you have with another person, and your etiquette is crucial to making a good impression. However, greetings can be a potential source of embarrassment. This is particularly true of feminine greetings because there are a number of different styles depending on your culture, relationship with the other person, and situation. As a rule of thumb, greetings that involve kissing and hugging should be reserved for close friends or relatives. If you are still not sure how to great someone, let them take the lead. It is also important to mention that no matter the style you should look the person you are greeting in the eyes and smile warmly.

Avoid Laughing Loudly

As a woman, it is important you know how to smile and laugh in a feminine fashion. Laughing loudly might attract the wrong attention and have a negative impact on your feminine image. Also, when you smile, ensure that it is a genuine smile. People will notice if you are faking, and you will come across as insincere.

Use Polite Words

Words such as “please” and “thank you” are perfect examples of easy ways you can improve your etiquette as a woman. Always be polite to people not only with your words but also with your actions. This applies to both things you do and don’t do. For example, paying attention to only one person when others are present might come across as rude. You should always strive to make everyone feel comfortable and appreciated when in a group setting.

Mind Your Table Manners

MTF Trans Woman

Table manners say a lot about a woman. When having a meal with other people, you should make sure that you are well versed in table etiquette. This includes how to use your napkin, when and how you use the utensils, and even how you hold your wine glass. For example, at a formal dinner, your napkin should be placed on your lap as soon as you are seated. It should remain there unless you are leaving the table.

In conclusion, although etiquette might not be the sexiest part of being a woman, it is an inherent part of being female and, therefore, cannot be overlooked.

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Building Confidence As A FTM Trans Guy

FTM Trans Guy

As a FTM trans guy, there are several things that should always be in your metaphorical survival kit. Confidence is the most important. Every step of your transitioning period should be punctuated with confidence, and a lack of confidence can negatively affect your ability to embrace your manliness. However, if you are having trouble building your self-confidence, you should know that you are not alone. Here are a few tips that can help you build confidence and live the life you always dreamed of.

Understand Your Strengths and Weaknesses

Everyone has unique skills and talents, just as they also have areas for improvement. While many of these would remain the same even after your transition, some may have changed. As a rule of thumb, make sure that you know what you are good at and what your weaknesses are. Once you understand these areas, you will be able to improve your self-confidence.

Be a Friend to Yourself

Unfortunately, some FTM trans men are their own worst enemy. It is impossible to build your self-confidence up if you are the one constantly putting yourself down. If you want confidence and high self-esteem, you need to love and accept yourself first. You must avoid negative thoughts or being self-deprecating.

Remember and Celebrate Your Success

Never make the mistake of downplaying your success or only focusing on what you are struggling with. Such traits will not help you build self-confidence. Focusing on the negative aspects of your life will only drag you further down. However, if you create a habit of celebrating your successes (no matter how small they are), you will soon feel more confident.

Take Risks

There is no better way of building self-confidence than taking risks. Taking risks shows that you are confident in yourself and your abilities. However, you do not have to do something scary or dangerous to achieve this. Simply getting out of your comfort zone and trying something new would be enough. In essence, this point is all about living your life to the fullest. You may not like the outcome of something you do, but you may forever regret not giving yourself the opportunity to try.

Be Persistent

It is important to realize that confidence does not appear overnight. It takes time and effort to build it up. Therefore, you should be persistent and never give up. Never make any excuses and try to learn from your mistakes instead of repeating them. As they say, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.”

FTM Transgender Guys

As a final note, if you are struggling with self-confidence and do not know where to start, find a trusted friend with whom you can share your troubles. Having a strong support system can help you be more confident and give you the foundation you need to begin building confidence on your own.

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Tips For Making A Long-Distance Transsexual Relationship Work

A Long-Distance Transsexual Relationship

Long-distance relationships are not for the faint of heart. Being a transsexual or endeavoring to date a transsexual is not for the faint-hearted either. Due to the bravery and dedication these people bring to the table, it should be clear that long-distance transsexual relationships can work in real life. However, this does not mean there won’t be any challenges. To make a long-distance transsexual relationships work, you must be willing to invest your time and commitment, as well as use some creativity. If you have found a match on a transgender dating site, but the only thing between the two of you is distance, do not fret.

There are ways to help you keep your long-distance transsexual relationship healthy, functional, and sexual. These tips include:

Keeping Your Word

Trust is a key ingredient in long-distance transsexual relationships. In order to keep you happy as a couple, it is important that both of you trust each other. If you have a plan to communicate on a daily or weekly basis, it is important that both of you honor that arrangement. You and your partner will only achieve stability if you create concrete plans. Concrete plans do not necessarily mean meeting physically; conversations and dates can be done virtually. For there to be unwavering trust, the two of you need to be confident that you can rely on each other.

Setting Aside Time for Each Other

Despite the distance, it is important that the two of you set aside time for each other regularly. All relationships require time and energy spent on communication. By dedicating time to each other and communicating often, both of you will be building a firm foundation for your love to stand on. Setting aside time for each other could be something as simple as a call after work every day or a simple “I love you” text before bed.

Keeping the Love Alive

Long-Distance Transsexual Relationship

To avoid either partner being sexually frustrated, it is important that both of you keep the love alive in a physical sense as well as an emotional sense. It is perfectly fine and natural to tease each other with dirty photos and sexy messages. Keeping your sex lives active and healthy in a long-distance transsexual relationship requires a bit is creativity. One example is phone sex, though technology provides for a variety of other options. Hearing your partner moan and breath sexily while the two of you pleasure yourselves can make it seem real. And when you are reunited, make sure to spend time together intimately.

Keeping on Keeping On

In every relationship, whether local or long-distance, it is highly recommended that you use your best judgment with what feels right for you and your partner. Despite the difficulties and frustration that distance causes, you can grow as a person and as a couple with a bit of commitment, communication, and creativity.

As a final note, it is important to discuss with your partner when the distance will end. Knowing that there is a concrete conclusion to the separation is very important in a long-distance transsexual relationship because it erases doubts and creates hope for both of you.

Ways To Impress A Transgender Woman

Transgender Woman

Despite the milestones that have been reached in the social emancipation of transsexuals, the idea of dating a transgender woman remains a distant thought for most straight men. However, there are some brave souls who have decided that there is nothing wrong with dating a transsexual woman. These men gallantly visit transgender dating sites looking to find the perfect match. If you are one of these brave souls, then it is important for you to arm yourself with some surefire ways to impress a transgender woman. These tips will not only help you to woo a transgender but also will help ensure a happy relationship.

Compliment

An honest compliment will go a long way in helping you impress a transsexual woman. Even when you are just chatting on a transgender dating site, make sure that you pass a few compliments to your partner in order to get things moving. Honest compliments are very important because they provide validation for the transsexual woman. The sense of affirmation that comes from a well-meant compliment is very important for how she feels as a woman.

Have a Plan

After you have wooed a transsexual woman from a transsexual dating site, you should always have a plan for your first date. Transsexual Woman love a man who can take the lead; therefore, being wishy-washy with your plans can be a complete turn-off. Given that you have already chatted with her online, it is important to be creative and plan something that is related to her interests. Recognizing and partaking in activities she enjoys will certainly impress her.

Be Trans-Sensitive

It is important to treat a transgender woman just as you would a cisgender woman. When out on a date, treat her with respect and engage her in meaningful conversation. If you have questions about her transition process, save them for another time. The two of you are on a date; this is not the time for an interrogation or an interview. It is also important, for the obvious reasons, to avoid insulting or using insensitive words, such as tranny, she-male, he/she, shim, or it. These words are dehumanizing to transgender people and should not even cross your mind when dating a transsexual woman.

Be Punctual

Although this might sound like an easy task, many men still show up late even on the first date. Being late will never impress a woman, transsexual or not. Show that you value her time by being punctual and prepared. Your date will certainly be impressed.

Be a Gentleman

There is no substitute for being a gentleman when dating a transsexual woman. If you want to impress her and win her affections, it is of the utmost importance that you are on your best behavior. Additionally, it is not enough to only be polite and courteous to her; you should also extend those chivalrous manners to everyone else you encounter while on your date, including service people and other guests. Finally, it is generally accepted that the gentleman should pay for the first date. Subsequent dates, however, can and should be split in whatever way suits you and your partner.

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Laverne Cox: Bright Star and Transgender Activist

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